Sex Toy Road Test: Gray anatomy

By Jon Duede

The Hustler Silicone Bendable Vibrating Dong may not look extravagant—or even festive—but this is a case of form following function. While there is a certain W hotel kind of subdued elegance to it, this toy has been designed to please more than the eye. And please it does.

Available online for about $50, The Hustler SBVD is a sleek, simple vibrator. Yes, I said vibrator. But this ain’t your momma’s “back massager.” It’s a long silver shaft with a flanged base. (The base is important, but I’ll get to that in a minute.) It also has a small hole drilled in the bottom end that perfectly fits the accompanying Micro Mini vibrator.

Best of all, it’s 100 percent silicone, which is the highest-quality, safest, and longest-lasting material available for sex toys today. (See “Burning Rubber” in the July 2007 issue.) With an eight-inch length and two-inch girth, it’s not for you advanced hos—I mean pros. But it does make a perfect beginner’s toy.

One of my favorite features is the internal armature—basically a built-in flexible spine. This helps you bend or shape the shaft into just the right angle for you to get your prostate involved in the action. Obviously, the most awesome thing about owning your own sex toy is that you can get exactly what you need whenever you need it. And better yet is a toy that can change its shape to fit your anatomy.

Which brings me to a confession: I’m not a size queen, but short cocks (and stubby fingers) just can’t reach my P-spot the way I like. However, the length and malleability of this particular dong easily remedies that problem. After bending it back and forth (thank you, armature inventor) I found the shape for me to play with: mostly straight with a slight bend at the end—the better to seek, find, and stimulate.

Another practical feature of the toy is its flanged end. Why is that important, you might ask? (Well, you might.) Your ass creates incredible suction when there’s something playing around the opening. If the end weren’t wide, the toy would get sucked in. Trust me, you want your hands free for other things. Like aiding the back-door thrusting with your left while you please your penis with your right.

One final trick for this toy is to insert the multispeed Micro Mini, which goes from a gentle hum to powerful tremors. Happily, another quality of silicone’s molecular structure is its ability to carry vibrations throughout its shape. (Think of dropping a pebble into a calm pond.) The Micro Mini may be small—hence the name—but the dong acts as an amplifier for the vibrations. Oh, and two sets of batteries are included, so you can take your dong for multiple rides without delay.

After warming the toy up for a minute by holding it under a faucet, it’s ready to go in. Lube it and you for an easy, comfortable ride, but stick to water- or oil-based products, since silicone-based lubricants can bond with silicone toys and mess them up.

The smooth, sturdy shaft easily glides in, and I can feel the extra width at the base. I can also feel it heating up inside me (thank you, temperature-sensitive silicone), and we’re off to the races. The head is perfectly poised at my prostate and the fun begins. After experimenting with the vibration speeds I find one that’s in tune with my own sexual vibe and go back to work.

The best part of playing with this toy is during orgasm. If you squeeze your ass during your climax while it’s stimulating your prostate your orgasm should be more intense and longer than simply whacking off. I also find that I blast a lot farther.

Cleanup couldn’t be easier. Wash with a liquid antibacterial soap and rinse thoroughly. You can even boil your toy or toss in it the dishwasher. (But remove the Micro Mini first!.

All in all this is a class act. As I said before, form follows function, and what better function than to give yourself a great big O?

The Hustler Silicone Bendable Vibrating Dong is available at online retailers for about $50.